My sister was coming back from studying abroad and even though she’s older than me, she did not have her driver’s license.  But I did.  She was excited, talking about all the places we could go now that I had my license like going shopping, going to the Korean market and going to the gym… but my stomach dropped as I heard her.  I would now be in control of my sister's life and this made my chest ache just thinking about it.  What if we got in an accident and she got injured.  What if I crashed and she died.  I hold my sister very close to my heart and I hadn’t felt this much stress about driving for a while, until now.

“You realize we can’t go on the highway.  I have not gone alone yet,” I mentioned to my sister.  She assured me with,

“Yeah, yeah, it’s fine.  We can still get to places.” 

Fast forward to two days after we came back home and my sister got a last minute doctor’s appointment.  My parents had to go play pickleball, they could NOT miss it!  So, it was up to me to drive my sister.  With great power comes great responsibility.  I suited up with my sunglasses in case of glare and had my car keys in hand.  I was ready.

Spoiler alert— I WAS NOT READY!  We were driving nicely along a pretty average road when I got a quick glance of a detour sign.

“It’s probably fine,” I told my sister.  It was not fine.

            We hit a blocked off part of the road and I pulled over to the side.  We looked on google maps and then I realized: we have to take the highway now.  Prior to this moment, I had been on the highway but always with my driving instructor or parent.  Never alone.  My heart started to beat faster in my chest.  This would be the day.  It’s time. 

As we were nearing the on ramp, I remembered what my dad told me,

Leave lots of space between you and the car in front of you so you can merge more easily.

And my driving instructor’s advice:

Try to speed up to match the speed of the cars driving by.  The sooner the better.

There was an open spot, I checked my blind spot and I slowly moved to the lane beside me.  I was driving on the highway!  I focused on the road but started to settle in.  I gave lots of space in front of me so I had more time to react and tried to stagger to avoid being blocked off by cars on all sides.  

As we got on a smaller road, nearing our destination, the sky darkened fast.  A wavefront of thunder clouds moved in.  I sped up to try to make it to the doctor’s appointment on time.

Whoooooshhhhhh.

Our whole minivan jerked to the side from the wind.  My sister and I looked at each other with wide eyes.  There was no one beside us thankfully but I realized the storm could quickly spin our car out of control.  After that, I then drove at a slower speed.

We eventually made it to the doctor’s office and I sighed in relief.  We were safe from the storm for now.

But it wasn’t over yet.  We still had to make it home.

As we got back outside the whole sky was a dark ultramarine.  Flashes of lightning met us on all sides.  The sky was ready to dump.  We sprinted to the car and when we got inside, we did not know what to do next.  I asked my sister,

“Should we wait out the storm or try to beat it, you think?”

“Hmmmm, if we leave now I think we will avoid the worst of it,” she replied.  So we headed on the road, trying to escape the storm brewing behind us.  

“I’m going to take the highway home.”  I said out loud, but mostly trying to convince myself.  Each rumble of thunder behind us made me grip the wheel tighter.  Just as I sighed in relief from the lack of rain, the sky opened up.  Fat raindrops hit the windshield.  ​​My windshield wipers struggled to keep up, pushing litres of water off the car every swipe. A flash of light lit up the entire road, followed by a deafening crack. The vehicles around me seemed to blur in the waves of rain and I felt myself losing control.

But I remembered what I had been taught.

I eased my foot off the gas to increase my following distance. “When there is bad weather, leave more space in front of you,” I mumbled to myself, counting the seconds between me and the blue car ahead.  A car behind me had no headlights on. My stomach clenched, but I breathed through the panic. I kept my wheel steady and my speed slow. I stayed in the right lane the entire time, where the pace was calmer. I kept checking my mirrors but never fixated on them. Eyes always scanning, like they said in class.

The storm was indecisive, and an image of us getting into an accident flashed in my mind.  But I did not let that anxiety control me, it guided me.  I stayed alert the entire time, passed every intersection with caution, kept both hands firmly at 9 and 3 on the wheel.  No music, no phone, no distractions.  When we finally pulled into our driveway, I parked, turned off the car, and stood still for a second.

My sister turned to me, “You did really well, it was good you didn’t freak out.”

That moment meant everything. Because deep down, I had freaked out—but I had also done everything I could to stay in control.

Defensive driving is what got me and my sister through that evening.  Even in the middle of a thunderstorm on a highway I’d never taken alone, it guided us the whole way home.  It’s more than just reacting to a situation, it’s preparing for it before it even happens. That’s why driver’s education is so valuable to me.  It did not just teach me how to drive but how to think while driving.

Most teens think learning to drive is just about the mechanics: steering, stopping and signaling. But what they don’t always realize is that you can be doing all of those things correctly and still end up in an accident because of someone else’s mistake or if you just happen to slip up one time.  Defensive driving teaches you to expect that.  You’re not in control of what others might do or of being perfect 100% of the time but you are in control of having a plan when something goes wrong and knowing what to do.  

This matters even more when you consider the statistics. According to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA), novice teen drivers are twice as likely than older drivers to be in a fatal crash. Inexperience, immaturity, and high risk behaviour are major reasons. A single accident at this age can result in serious injury, thousands of dollars in damages, lasting trauma or worse, someone’s life. And it only takes a few seconds of poor judgment for it all to happen.

That’s why driver’s education needs to be taken more seriously and the defensive driving skills that comes with it.  My own driving course didn’t just show us videos of crashes or hand out rulebooks, it gave us real-life scenarios: what to do if someone tailgates you, how to respond to a car swerving into your lane, what to do if your brakes go out or visibility drops to zero. These are the kinds of lessons that saved me on the highway that day.

If we want safer roads for everyone, we need to make sure teens know how to drive well and to avoid putting them in dangerous situations.  That’s where regulations come in.  Like our province is already doing, there should be laws in place to avoid dangerous situations.  For example, in Ontario if you are 19 or younger, you can carry only one passenger aged 19 or under between the hours of midnight and 5am for the first six months of having your licence.

Teen driving isn’t just a rite of passage. It’s a responsibility. And defensive driving turns that responsibility into a skill, one that can protect lives, including the people we love most sitting right beside us.